So, Austen has a field trip today to Wildlife Prairie Park. I thought I would try to suprise him by going to with him on this great little adventure. . . I sometimes feel guilty because I don't get to participate in his field trips or class parties because I am usually teaching, so hence the idea that I would suprise him.
I painstakingly made arrangements for a sub to take my classes, I got my leave of absence approved by both principals, I double checked to make sure I had extra personal days- I was set and excited!
As I waited to tell Austen the great news, I envisioned us running through the prairie land together, laughing, and enjoying our special time together. I could picture Austen smiling at me in gratefulness for being his mom and for "sacrficing" to be at his last field trip.
Austen finally came home form school, and I beamed as I told him I was going with him tomorrow. "We get to hang out together, just you and me. Aren't you excited, Austen?"
My son's face said it all. His exuerberant face became down-trodden,a s he slowly said. . . "You know, mom, you don't really have to go if you don't want to." Don't want to? Why wouldn't you want me to? I'm a fun gal, don't you want to be with me?
I slowly picked up the pieces of my shattered heart and ran to my husband for reassurance. It was then that he informed of rule # 317 in the How to Raise Boys Handbook:
"The words hang out with each other implies to a little boy
that he must solely spend time with his mother. Little boys
don't always want to hang out with their mothers, not when
there are other little boys to hang out with. While thier
mothers may be fun, they would rather have adventures
with their friends who are really, really fun!"
All right, so this made sense to me. Of course he wanted me there, just not running together hand in hand through the prairies. And of course he loves me, he just may not be expressing his heartfelt, undying love for me every second of the day. So, I am okay with watching Austen have fun with his friends and having little adventures with them. Hey, at least I am there to witness his adventures, right?! And when he needs lunch or money. . . well, then he'll be glad that I was there!
4 comments:
Amy,
I love your realness! I am praying for your adventurous day...with your son and anyone else around. May they be deeply touched by the Lord at work in your life. God bless YOU today!
MR
I know that it is hard, taking care of everyone elses kids and not feeling like you have time for your own! I am so glad that you got to go! I am sure you will have a blast. If it is any consolation, I would love to run through prairieland, holding hands, with you. OK, never mind. That would be too wierd!
Oh, how they slip away so fast! Isaiah already won't let me hug him unless he's hurt.....I love it when he gets hurt! :)
so, how did that field trip go?
btw - you have a way with words. :) keep writing. :) And, despite how you feel overwhelmed by the whole drama part of the new storytelling series... you really are the best and you have a knack for such things - perhaps you just need a quick getaway, a brief retreat? Take care! Me
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